but even if the stars and moon collide [afterparty]

[allatonce]

[Well, that sucked!

After about an hour, invitations written in colorful ink appear under everyone's doors.]

Understandable if you're not up to it, but we're having a memorial and "don't wanna be alone" hang-out in the restaurant again.

[The restaurant has very much been decorated with the most rainbow fabric she could find in the department store. Jonathan got roped in, mainly so she could make sure he was doing okay, but also because she assumed that he knew how to put a tablecloth on a table. He seemed like the type, anyway.

After consulting with Undertaker, most of the food that's been set out is more traditional Chinese funeral food than Victorian—you can get a whole roast duck in the restaurant—but she tried for a mix of things. There is fruit, the aforementioned roast duck, and several vegetarian dishes along with potatoes for some reason and... cookies? Okay then.

Joy's trying, because that was way less terrible for her than it was for basically anyone else.

Happy Pride Wrath, New Rapture!]

Comments

[allatonce]

Well, I've been trying to tell everyone else ones that are a little shorter, but mostly.

[The shorter ones are more interactive, so they feel involved! Hopefully!]

I'm glad you liked it, though.

[pairtner]

Perhaps the act of wanting to tell a joke is kinder than some empty encouragement. I should attempt to see if that works.

[Aiba wasn't made to be supportive to a lot of people. She was made first and foremost to support Date. She doesn't have enough experience yet for that]

[allatonce]

I try not to tell people things I don't mean. Life's already so fucking meaningless, I don't want my words to be meaningless too.

[She shrugs.]

[pairtner]

Perhaps so.

[Hey, since you bring that up...]

What caused your nihilism? You have made no secret of it at all.

[allatonce]

I invented the Everything Bagel.

[This is, I swear to god, a real answer to the question and not her dodging it. She is entirely sincere when she says it, like it's a complete explanation.]

[pairtner]

That explains nothing at all!

[To her that looked like an incredibly random answer, hah]

[allatonce]

[Joy sighs and leans against the wall, looking up at the ceiling.]

I spent a really long time trying to do exactly what Penelope killed for. You try and fix it. You get something else. Then, eventually, you're so far away from where you started that... you're almost not you anymore. Like if you had completely different programming, you know?

[She brings her hands up, making a circle with her fingers and holding them up until the ceiling light is framed in them.]

But I got bored of that. So I took a bagel and I put everything on it. Everything—all my hopes and dreams, every breed of dog, every last personal ad on Craigslist. Sesame. Poppy Seed. Salt.

[Laughing, Joy drops it hands.]

Did you know when you put everything on a bagel, it collapses in on itself and becomes a black hole? But it showed me the truth: nothing matters.

[pairtner]

So when you say 'everything bagel', you mean absolutely Everything in existence, crammed together on top of a pastry.

[...............]

Is this one of those 'it's how another universe works' things? Because this is stretching my suspension of disbelief, even taking that into account.

[Not that she thinks Joy is lying, it just is...so, so bizarre and surreal!]

[allatonce]

No, no: the Everything Bagel. It's different from an everything bagel.

[That's why it's capitalized on her profile! Those are two different things.]

Anyway it's like I've said: anything is possible somewhere. So yeah, in most universes I couldn't have made a black hole out of a bagel I put some toppings on.

[pairtner]

Once another oddity that feels like seeing it myself will make it more understandable.

[...still...this all makes her wonder...]

I'm aware you're intensely nihilistic, but that doesn't mean your heart is as dead as your belief in everything. Are you alright, Joy?

[allatonce]

Honestly? This is the okayest I've felt in a while.

[Which is possibly, like, concerning? But.]

[pairtner]

I'm sure in some way that response should be alarming.

[Oh well, what can one do, really]

[allatonce]

Probably, but I'm one of the people you have to worry about least. It's kind of nice, being here.

[pairtner]

Something about this doesn't fill me with confidence.

[Probably related to her nihilism. Maybe that's why she then offers:]

If you ever need to talk, I don't mind listening. Consider it my thanks, for telling me that joke.

[allatonce]

I might take you up on that, who knows. [She laughs, just a little.] I had a friend like you, you know, in one universe. Well, sort of. Her projected form looked like Ruth Bader Ginsberg.