let's consider a change of scenery [group vandalism]

[dullshooter]

[On Wednesday morning, everyone will find a note outside their suite door. If you can get past Misfire’s dodgy handwriting, it reads:]


Hey LOSERS!!!

Get down to miracle mile 2DAY, 12PM, for some

VANDALISM

[Note: ‘vandalism’ is written with one of those ‘cool S’s.]

kit will be provided BUT if you have a water gun from the machine bring it!!!

P.S no snitches allowed
JK you can come n be target practice ;)


[At the appointed time, Misfire can be found standing triumphantly in the street. Beside him is a pile of spray cans, brushes, and buckets of paint; by the looks of it, he emptied the whole store. He’s wearing the dress Forrest made him too, and using the pocket space to carry even more stuff on him.

When enough people have gathered, he’ll address them:]

Alright, here’s the deal: it’s come to my attention that some of you have missed out some crucial formative experiences, or otherwise haven’t known the joys of anti-social behavior. And, since writing stuff on walls has been a historical expression of dissent, I think there’s no better time or place to fix that.

[Grinning, he picks up something out of his pile - a water gun filled with purple paint.]

Frankie didn’t outlaw vandalism, so let’s make him realize that egregious oversight. In technical terms - go nuts.

Comments

[allatonce]

Oh, absolutely.

[This is queer solidarity.]

Kinda sad we don't have laser tag or something. Instead this is kinda "make your own paintball."

[inaclearing]

[arms exchange!]

Oh, this place would make a great urban paintball zone! It'd be...god, it'd be brutal.

[allatonce]

Fontaine would never go for it, on account of it would probably make us way more chill, but it would be, as the kids say, epic.

[Do the kids say that? The sample size here is bad.]

[inaclearing]

I don't think they're saying that anymore.

[Brett actually does have a weird number of teenage friends! But in a normal way, not a Will Schuester way.]

[allatonce]

They're saying it somewhere in the multiverse, so I'm right.

[Yes. This is her excuse for everything.]

[inaclearing]

You could say that about anything!

[allatonce]

I know, it's great! It's a pre-made excuse for absolutely everything.

[inaclearing]

You could say there's just as many universes where there is no excuse. Where no one's ever said "epic" at all.

[allatonce]

Oh, way more. Life doesn't evolve in, like, fully 50% of universes so technically language doesn't exist in those words.

[inaclearing]

Makes sense.

[Like, statistically, he's a little surprised it isn't more than 50%.]

How do you go there? I mean - well, I don't think I understand it well enough to ask any decent questions.

[allatonce]

[Some of them have bacteria or whatever, so.]

There's two theories, I guess. One is that when I cracked my brain, just like totally Humpty Dumpty'd that bitch, I threw myself into every universe. Even the ones where I shouldn't be, because like. Rocks aren't alive.

[She starts refilling her water gun with black paint.]

The other is that, you know Buddhism? The reincarnation bit, it doesn't necessarily mean you come back as a human so maybe like. The same souls exist in every universe, and sometimes you come back as a rock to sit on a cliff and contemplate your life.

[inaclearing]

[The Buddhism thing makes sense enough, but hey wait up hold on a second - ]

You cracked your brain?

[allatonce]

Yeah. I was going to say "not literally" but then I remember I kind of did literally crack my brain open to, uh. Become the way I am.

[She grimaces, just a little. It goes back to her motive the week before, the one that ended in her screaming. It hurt to fracture your mind into an infinite number of little pieces, all of them clamoring for attention.]

You know that guy, the fraud one? Blue cover, hand covered in sprinkles? That's sort of what happened to my brain. Split it up into an infinite number of little sprinkles, so many and so fine that I couldn't fix it even in a thousand lifetimes.

[inaclearing]

Yeah, James Frey.

[Brett, a writer who does similar stuff, actually does know about this guy off-hand!]

Are you... [Mmm. He hesitates.] ...okay? I know that might be a stupid question, but I don't...know what else to ask.

[allatonce]

... It's really quiet here. I forgot what that was like, honestly.

[That both is and isn't an answer to his question, in a way that leaves it sort of open-ended.]

It happened a long time ago, though. I'm used to it by now.

[inaclearing]

That doesn't mean it's okay. You can get used to a lot.

[His tone is gentle, not really pushy, but...well, he's rarely one to let things just pass by.]

[allatonce]

It's as okay as it can be, you know? All the King's horses and all the King's men, they couldn't put Joy Wang back together again.

[She shrugs, a little helpless.]

So she put gold in the cracks and built something new—a little bit wrong, but Joy through and through.

[All of that is said in the cadence of reciting something from memory, rather than being something she came up with on the spot.]

[inaclearing]

Mmm. Kintsugi.

[he fucking READS]

That's a...nice thought. Good way of looking at it.

[allatonce]

Sometimes you spend a while being a rock and it, you know, give you perspective about stuff.

[Or something.]

[inaclearing]

Never thought I'd say this, but I think I could use some rock time.

This place is bad! He wants to be a rock!