let's consider a change of scenery [group vandalism]

[dullshooter]

[On Wednesday morning, everyone will find a note outside their suite door. If you can get past Misfire’s dodgy handwriting, it reads:]


Hey LOSERS!!!

Get down to miracle mile 2DAY, 12PM, for some

VANDALISM

[Note: ‘vandalism’ is written with one of those ‘cool S’s.]

kit will be provided BUT if you have a water gun from the machine bring it!!!

P.S no snitches allowed
JK you can come n be target practice ;)


[At the appointed time, Misfire can be found standing triumphantly in the street. Beside him is a pile of spray cans, brushes, and buckets of paint; by the looks of it, he emptied the whole store. He’s wearing the dress Forrest made him too, and using the pocket space to carry even more stuff on him.

When enough people have gathered, he’ll address them:]

Alright, here’s the deal: it’s come to my attention that some of you have missed out some crucial formative experiences, or otherwise haven’t known the joys of anti-social behavior. And, since writing stuff on walls has been a historical expression of dissent, I think there’s no better time or place to fix that.

[Grinning, he picks up something out of his pile - a water gun filled with purple paint.]

Frankie didn’t outlaw vandalism, so let’s make him realize that egregious oversight. In technical terms - go nuts.

Comments

[inaclearing]

Oh...I'm sorry.

[Sure sounds like they're dead!]

[giddyundertaker]

[ They sure as hell are dead! Dead as doornails. And such horrible ways to die, as well... ]

Aye... It's hard work, sometimes. I never liked having to bury good friends.

[ He can't really fiddle with his lockets if he doesn't have them... But... That thought gives him another. ]

Say, could you check to see if a chain of funeral lockets falls out the next time you put coins in that dispenser machine?

[inaclearing]

I haven't seen anything like that so far, but sure - I'll keep an eye out.

["Funeral lockets" are a thing now as well? Well, they probably just look like regular lockets, right?]

...I can't imagine having to do that for someone you knew. Wasn't there anybody else?

[giddyundertaker]

You'll know when you do. They all contain a lock of the desceased's hair, along with their names and dates of birth and death.

[ You know, like what he tried to make at the tea party two weeks ago. ]

No, I never have to prepare them for burial, but I still do... Just to see them one last time, if nothing else.

[inaclearing]

I've never really found that helpful.

[But you know. That's him.]

[giddyundertaker]

Eh... [ Shrugs his shoulders. ] I suppose you might not find it helpful.

[inaclearing]

Yeah, yeah - different for everyone.

[Of course he knows that, but you know, he's allowed to talk about his own experiences for a second.]

In my world, where I'm from...people are farther away from death than they used to be, I think. Most people don't die at home anymore.

[giddyundertaker]

Huh...?

[ He tilts his head at this. ]

What do you mean by that?

[inaclearing]

I think...we try so hard to sequester any reminders of mortality away, that we're worse at handling it when it does happen. Like if we just ignore it and pretend, death will never come for us, or anyone we care about.

[giddyundertaker]

Ah...

[ He shakes his head. ]

My world's a bit different. Though many would like to deny it, it seems much of England is obsessed over their mortality. So much effort goes into funerals and mourning...

[inaclearing]

I don't know if it's still like that over there or not. I've never left America.

[Probably not, he suspects? But like, what does he really know.]

[giddyundertaker]

... Ah. That explains a lot.

[ So the colonies have evolved in strange ways. What a particular future this is. ]

[inaclearing]

...does it?

[Geez, it's true that he's never been abroad, but he didn't think he came off that provincial.]