unknownseas | don't go breaking my heart

[Well. All that sure happened!

Brett hasn't done much for one of these post-trial gatherings thus far, but he's been trying very hard to be functional lately, and...well, the fact that so many other people aren't okay right now just makes that all the more important. So he'll go around telling people, or slipping notes under doors if need be:]

We're going to have some food at the bar, if anyone wants it.

- Brett & Joy

[It feels a little weird to have it there, but...let's be honest. He expects quite a few people will be passing through the bar of the own accord tonight. They may as well not drink on empty stomachs.

There's not a ton going on. Brett's figured out how to turn the light-up dance floor off - it seemed a little inappropriate. Despite being hosted at the bar, Brett hasn't actually set out any alcohol; there's tamagoyaki and a big vat of chicken noodle soup sitting on some tables in the middle of the room, as well as tea for anyone who wants a drink that isn't alcoholic. Everyone who does want to drink can serve themselves. Also, someone has draped a rainbow pride flag over the bar? It seems appropriate given who's throwing the party, at least, and he didn't really have it in his to stop Joy, so.

You're free to turn on some music, if you want. Brett couldn't pick anything out on the jukebox, it seems.]

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[After a moment, Misfire concedes a nod.]

Yeah, me too.

['Something' won't change things, and some things can make it all worse, but if he keeps his standards low he can't be disappointed.

He wants to leave and leave it, despite his hobby of subjecting Gaius to every inane thought that occupies his brain module. But something nags at him; that need to talk about your 'feelings' that's universally experienced by every living being with enough complexity to communicate.

Dandy had always pressed him to do the whole soul-bearing thing, and whilst he thinks the wishes of the dead are a pointless thing to follow up on and kinda stupid, he is still holding that notebook.]

...You mind if I seek your paternal wisdom for a sec?

Certainly not. Ask what you will.

[As much as Misfire occasionally gets on his nerves, it… isn’t actually terrible, and also they’re both going through it so like.

…he does half expect it to be something stupid but. You know.]

[It's immediately after asking that Misfire realises he doesn't know what to follow it up with. He knows its supposed to be some kind of big release, but where to even start? His instinct is to come out with something glib and self effacing, and it feels like pulling teeth to do anything but.]

I -- [Urgh.] I can't decide whether I should've seen this coming, or if I've seen enough during the past several million years that, at this point, I shouldn't even care. [It sounds like he's about done, but then suddenly-] And don't even get into how I should be giving a scrap - that pinhead butchered someone I'd call close enough to a friend, and despite that I'm still conflicted on whether I want to hit him for that or for leaving.

[He gets to the end of it and...exhales. Wow it all just...came out, just like that.]

[..oof. yeah. uh.

...

yeah.]

...Betrayals of this sort are not easy to deal with for anyone. I regret that I cannot give you better advice, but...

[sigh.]

This situation is effectively engineered to cause such scenarios, and I do not think there is any real way to solve that dilemma. I am not absolving Dawon of responsibility, of course, but it is not as though I have not dealt with the fallout of people for whom I care deeply doing terrible things. I simply... do not entirely know how to deal with it myself.

If you don’t know what to do, then we’re screwed.

[He laughs at that, at least.]

I mean, I’ve done bad things. Loads of them. And I don’t have the excuse of being dead for god-knows-how-many years for it. [He shrugs with some defeat.] So it’s not like I can judge.

[And he didn’t, not for nearly everyone else. This place is all about pushing people to their brinks, but this time-]

…I’m just going to miss him, I guess. Whether I want to or not.

I have never claimed to be infallible. None of us are saints here either, I would imagine.

[…]

I will not claim to be as close to him as you were, but… despite everything, even if I am disappointed and angry, I will likely miss him as well.

…Yeah, I’ll drink to that.

[He’s drowned his sorrows, but maybe a cheers is in order. That’s his style, after all.]

Thanks, Gaius. For listening and…talking. ‘Preciate it.

You are quite welcome.

...

As I said, I cannot claim to have all the answers, but you are welcome to speak on such things should you require it.

[he's at least... going to try...]

I'll keep it in mind. Bearing my soul is pretty intense - I better take it easy before I hurt myself.

[He smirks, and seeks out the rest of his stuff in Seo Dawon's room. By 'his stuff', he also means 'stuff that he can lay claim to because its previous owner is dead now'. In the process, his hands find the toy figure of his buddy Grimlock. Somewhat absentmindedly, he shifts it from Dino- to Bot-mode.]

And - er - if you ever need anything... [It's funny, he thinks, how he views Gaius as an 'elder' despite having some many many years above him. Goes to show maturity doesn't come with age.] ...you'd probably be better off going to someone else. But if you ever want to make that questionable decision, I can return the favor.

I may consider it regardless. It never hurts to have a unique perspective on such matters, after all.

If I have anything going for me, it is that my perspective is unique.

Indeed--and I have to admit, I appreciate it, to some degree.

[Misfire smiles, just as devious as it is broad.]

Are you trying to say you actually like me, Woofie?

[Emotional moment’s over, back to the nickname.]

I have not simply walked away from any of our conversations, have I?

I assumed you were just being polite. That, or you knew it wouldn’t stop me.

Well, that may have been part of it, at least at the beginning… but I suppose I have gotten used to it.

Aw, stop - you’re gonna make me blush.

[He can’t do that.]

Glad to have worn you down, Woofie.

You can tout it as an achievement, if you like, I suppose.

I can, and will.

[It’s a promise.]

don't go breaking my heart

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cw: torture mention

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