I have died every day waiting for you

[lovelikeyou]

[That was, in Rose's opinion, even worse than last week. Any loss of life is an awful waste, but for it all to come of some horrible accident...

This week, she doesn't retreat back to her room. She knows now that the people here, or at least enough of them, like to gather after these experiences. Many of the Crystal Gems were the same way; she remembers their post-battle huddles well. It's not a party, really, but...it's good to be together. To have friends around. Maybe, to remember those who were lost.

So this time, she'll go to the cafeteria herself and request some food for everyone. It's just basic snacks, the kind of human food she knows well enough to ask for. There's some hot chocolate provided, too. She definitely knows people enjoy that. It doesn't take too long, since she isn't making most of it, and then she goes to invite everybody she can find.

She doesn't slip any notes underneath doors, for the people she doesn't happen across. Some Crystal Gems didn't join the groups, or maybe did after one battle but not another. Sometimes they wanted to be alone. She never really understood that...but it wasn't her place to tell them otherwise. Weren't they all about freedom?

Everybody probably knows something like this is going to happen again, anyway. It's their choice to come.]

Comments

[blackmass]

[Kirei wasn't particularly interested in the whole concept of togetherness or remembrance or whatever other sentimental nonsense was involved in such gatherings. But it had been a bit of an early morning for him, and it wasn't like he was going to get coffee anywhere else.]

[Don't mind him, sitting over here like this was a completely average morning.]

[emberserker]

And what were you laughing at?

[Anna glares at him, but it's no more resentment than usual. That might just be her face at this point.]

[blackmass]

Oh, that? I merely thought it amusing our Professor on high is not above childish sniping and arguments just as the rest of us seem so dedicated to.

[emberserker]

Hmph. I wasn't the one trying to shut down relevant questions to keep me and mine out of the line of suspicion two weeks in a row and counting.

[Rhea.]

[blackmass]

No, but we certainly do seem to devolve into bickering quite rapidly. Twice in a row, as you say.

[emberserker]

It wouldn't happen if people weren't so infuriating and asking stupid questions.

[blackmass]

And yet it does, because apparently we are.

[emberserker]

Are you lumping yourself in with that nonsense about Seteth not knowing how to talk about siblings?

[blackmass]

Only because you would be sure to point out some imagined hypocrisy if I didn't. As I recall it, I was one of the few piecing together what actually occurred rather than engage in such pointless idiocy.

[reallyhatesharks]

So tell me about why you call vampires "Dead Apostles," father.

[She's just gonna sit down with her drink and look at Kirei expectantly. Let's talk about vampires.]

[blackmass]

You think it's a name I came up with?

[He raised an eyebrow at her over his cup of coffee--it decidedly wasn't.]

Merely because I work for the Church does not mean I am versed in every inch of its etymological history.

[reallyhatesharks]

Oh, come on. There's no story about Jesus being a vampire? You just call them that and nobody thinks that's weird?

[The dead part she gets. It's the "apostle" part that strikes her as odd.]

[blackmass]

[Kirei sighed and set down the coffee mug, thinking over years of study just to get Nova off his case...and coming up with nothing. Either he didn't remember, or it had never been covered as the origin of the name was irrelevant next to 'vampires bad'.]

I simply don't have an answer. For all I know, the name was simply to signify that they were humans turned irrevocably from God's light.

[reallyhatesharks]

Okay, but isn't an apostle like. A member of the Jesus squad? So why would they be apostles? Wouldn't that be an apostrate?

[Somewhere out there, my theology teacher just broke out in a cold sweat and doesn't know why.

She means "apostate," for the record, but her Catholic sister Chara had a very thick accent and Nova is deeply areligious otherwise.]

[blackmass]

[Pinching the bridge of his nose, Kirei took a slow breath.]

[Lord, beer me strength.]

Apostate. And yes, logically that would make more sense. But I reiterate that I am not the one who coined the term to begin with.

[reallyhatesharks]

I can't believe your world goes around naming things cool shit and you don't even have stories behind why they're named that.

[Kirei!!! You're destroying her hopes and dreams!!!!!]

[blackmass]

Do you often delight in annoying people?

[drladysounds]

[Hmmm..this guy is a priest, isn't he? Maaaaaybe he's the kind of person she needs to talk with]

Excuse me? Father? Are you willing to give advice in this place?

[blackmass]

Certainly. I would be a poor man of God indeed were I to turn anyone away, especially under such circumstances.

[kirei, why are you like this]

[drladysounds]

[Shelley can't remember the last time she went to a confession, she hopes to remember how it's supposed to be done. Shelley sits down, contrite]

O, Father, I have sinned with sloth.

[...she guesses? It's either that or lust, but she doesn't feel particularly sorry about the lust]

Two weeks ago I was accused of not taking this place seriously. I was, it's just that I wasn't as worried as maybe I should have been and also I was just sitting around to see what would happen. Now I'm maybe more worried than I should be, but it's not like that has helped me do anything useful. Nothing I try seems to be helpful.

[Like...she has had plans, and tried them. None of them worked]

And now I'm lost. What am I supposed to do if trying gave no results?

1/2

[blackmass]

[The look on Kirei's face couldn't have more clearly spelled 'oh wow, you're actually serious about this' if he tried.]

[blackmass]

[Damn. Okay, uh. Guess he has to do his job.]

There is, I think, a marked difference between sloth and patience. I myself find I have opted for the latter; with little of note available to us, there is not much else to do but wait for opportunity to present itself.

[drladysounds]

[I'm so sorry, Kirei, Shelley has terrible judgment when it's about people, haha. She plays Scrabble with people holding her captive and spends a month lollygagging around in their evil bases]

So I should instead be waiting for the right chance? Even though it may never come?

[blackmass]

We haven't many options at hand, so far as I've noticed.

[so, 'what ELSE are we gonna do']

[drladysounds]

Maybe, but everyone says if you keep trying sooner or later a path opens. It just doesn't come in the way you expect.

[Sometimes by sheer luck, really]