WEEK 1

[bathymetric]

Well, you've now met the brains of the operation, as well as the shockingly nice-looking young lady in charge of day-to-day business. Now all that's left is to get used to your accommodations - there's 24 other people in similar shoes to yours to meet in this building, you know! And who knows how much longer you might have them...

The daily routine in the facility quickly becomes obvious - the only way to tell time moment to moment is to check the strange device The Professor gave you, but at the same time every day the lights in and out of the facility go up, and at the same time every night they go down. Otherwise, it's almost maddening sometimes, how little happens in here. At least you have a few rooms with enough to hopefully keep you occupied. Who knows what secrets they might hold? And there's always that vending machine, if you can find something that fits in the coin slot...





MONDAY | TUESDAY | WEDNESDAY | THURSDAY
FRIDAY | SATURDAY

[ ooc: Welcome to Peace Week! Enjoy it while it lasts. Remember, office hours for The Professor's Assistant are over here if you're interested, while regains can be deposited over here! ]

Comments

weird stuff

[reallyhatesharks]

[Most of the stuff? Not anything Nova wants. Bodycon dress covered in pictures of Nicolas Cage? Ok, technically she still doesn't want it but she figures she can just turn it inside-out and then she'll finally have something marginally wearable.]

I'm taking this. [She holds it up, just to clarify what "this" is.] And if you ever get another one, I'll take that one too.

[fivestagegod]

[Holy shit, someone's actually taking it. His day has just been made, you're an absolute peach.]

You're welcome to as many of those as I pull out of that machine. It's not like I'm going to use it.

[reallyhatesharks]

That's fair. Not everyone can pull off the slutty Nicholas Cage look.

[when i next see Lyndon in person, i am going to murder him for making me type the phrase "slutty Nicholas Cage look."]

[fivestagegod]

[...]

I am almost relieved that you recognize that man, because almost no one here does.

[reallyhatesharks]

Curse of divergent timelines - or in this case, alternate realities? Pretty sure talking ducks falls under alternate reality. Zombies are borderline.

[Fun Sharknado Fact: Sharknado is a prequel to the zombie show Z Nation. Zombies haven't appeared yet, but eh. Nova's willing to believe they're possible.]

[fivestagegod]

The talking duck is absolutely alternate reality. She has the same paintings as we do, except everything involves anthropomorphic animals and duck puns.

[The zombies are definitely borderline though, yeah.]

[reallyhatesharks]

Pretty sure the two butches are aliens, so that's alternate reality too. [Well.] At least my world operates by Fermi Paradox rules, regardless of what those guys on the "History" Channel say about aliens.

[Come on guy, the pyramids weren't built by ALIENS. They were built to house complex sharknado prevention measures. Obviously.]

Feel like they would've stopped by after we shot a bunch of sharks into space, but maybe not.

[fivestagegod]

...I would ask why, but I'm going to pause before I do that and ask whether there was a reason that wasn't "because we could."

[reallyhatesharks]

Oh, we shot the sharks into space accidentally because we were trying to turn on the space defense system the government told everyone was fake to shoot lasers at a sharknado off the coast of Florida.

[There's absolutely no pause before Nova's response, which is said in the same way someone else might say "Oh, it's raining outside."]

[fivestagegod]

[For what it's worth, he seems to take it well?]

...I am not at all surprised that that story involved Florida somehow. Why wouldn't it be Florida, really.

[reallyhatesharks]

On the Sharknado Disaster Scale, Florida was about as bad as it ever got. A bunch of different storm fronts converged to make a wall of sharks and the options to break it up were basically "shoot space lasers" or "drop a nuclear bomb."

[She shrugs. It be like that sometimes.]

[fivestagegod]

Is there a reason you have such a large congregation of sharks anywhere, or do things just happen to be like that where you're from?

[reallyhatesharks]

Short answer: it's just like that. Longer answer: the ancient magic seal keeping sharks in the water where they belong instead of in the sky weakened somehow and I've been trying to fix it for the past six years.

[She didn't know it was a magic seal at the beginning, but well. Hard to argue with an ancient artifact that allows you to call a sharknado whenever you want.]

[fivestagegod]

[...either her world is bugfuck or she is deeply mentally ill, but either way we currently stan a queen]

Well, you certainly qualify for those among us who were in the middle of something important when brought here.

[reallyhatesharks]

[It is both because Nova has deep and extremely all-consuming PTSD, but mostly the world of Sharknado just be like that.]

Yeah, you could say that. Of the people who could end up here, though, I'm not the most important and I'm choosing to believe the Professor when he says nobody else from my world is here.